Not enough time for the practices you want to do? Read this!
Probably the most common reason people tell me they struggle to maintain an embodiment practice like non-linear movement is that they can’t create enough privacy, space, and time for themselves to do it.
“I work all day and when I come home, the kids need my attention, I have to make dinner, and then spend time with my partner.” Oof – we’re all carrying so much. It’s a lot, and it’s all so legitimate – the demands on our time and the lack of space we have to deepen into ourselves.
I’m not about to tell you that bullshit story about if it was a priority you would make time for it blah blah blah. There may be some truth in that, but it glosses over the huge gap between the ideal and where we actually are, and it’s not useful if you're in the thick of it, which most of us are.
The thing is, you don’t actually need very much space or time to do non-linear movement. You don’t even need privacy. Is it ideal if you have those things? Yes. But do you NEED it? No.
In the last week, I have done non-linear on a plane, in a crowded train, laying on a crowded beach, and in a hotel room with friends in the same room. I wasn’t doing a full practice where I was free to move and express in any way I wanted. Rather, I was being very, very subtle – attuning to the sensations and currents in my body and very subtly moving and breathing.
Little and often is better when it comes to a practice like this. It’s better to do a few minutes of subtle practice while you’re on the train in the morning each day than it is to wait and try to do an hour every other weekend when you can squeeze it in.
The point of this practice is not necessarily catharsis. It’s not to have some huge release or big shift in your awareness. That can and does happen, for sure, but it’s not the main goal. What we are doing with this practice is learning the language of our inner world. Getting more nuance and fidelity on the currents of sensation that make up our internal experience, that tell us how to navigate the world. Helping the body to unwind tension, and stuckness. Creating new awareness.
“When I have time and privacy, then I’ll be able to do my embodiment practice….” This is the same story of how we hold ourselves back in all kinds of ways: we think - when xyz happens, then I’ll be happy, feel confident, get in shape, quit this horrible job. But that’s rarely how it works.
Underneath that thought are so many deeper threads: enoughness, perfectionism, the myth of hard work = success, our cultural obsession with results and “progress” over process, I could go on.
When I work with women, we turn that entire paradigm around so it’s no longer “do xyz to get abc result.” Instead, it's figuring out what she wants to experience and how can we bring that through the body NOW.
In other words, don’t wait until you can create the right conditions for embodiment practice, do it now, imperfectly.
In fact, having engaged with this practice in many different contexts for a number of years now, I’m coming to believe that practicing this way – imperfectly, in the middle of a crowded train or with other people present – is actually really beneficial because it helps us to practice FEELING OURSELVES in the midst of other people and stuff going on.
One thing I noticed over the years in myself was that I got really good at feeling what’s happening in my own inner experience when I was alone in my practice space. But taking that awareness into more intense dynamics where other people were present, it was a whole different game. Yeah, I could definitely maintain that awareness BETTER than before as a result of my non-linear practice. But I actually became more aware of the places where I lost the thread on my own inner experience in those situations.
I’ve deliberately put myself into more contexts where I can practice both feeling in and feeling out, or feeling in while other things are happening, and I think it’s really helpful and maybe even necessary for this to be part of our practice. In other words, if you practice for a few minutes while lying in bed next to your partner while he reads his phone, it’s not a less valuable practice. There’s actually something really important happening, which is that you’re learning to sense your inner experience while he’s present.
How do you do this? Decide to take a few minutes where you are going to quietly attend to the sensations in your body. You can close your eyes if that’s possible, or simply soften your gaze if it’s not. You can listen to some music, but you don’t have to. Begin to feel what’s present in your body. You can bring some subtle movement – it is very possible to subtly move through your entire central column without anyone noticing. Let your spine be like a flower moving in a soft summer breeze. Let your hips be like a boat gently rocking on a calm water. Let your shoulders be like the clouds moving across the sky. Something interesting is happening when you see just how subtle you can get in your body.
Now I want to hear from you. What questions are coming up? Have you tried this? If so, how did it go? Let me know in comments / hit reply and let me know.
PS: If you want to learn more about non-linear practice, I have instructions for a home practice here, and you can join a live class here.
